Hindsight is a marvellous thing Melissa’s hubby-to-be opens a window into the wedding planning journey from the groom’s perspective Hello readers, as I’m sure you’re all well aware, my beautiful Melissa has been detailing our journey from our couch-based lockdown proposal to the wedding altar, and what a journey it has been! Thankfully Melissa is the most organised person on the planet, so my involvement in this process has been minimal at best, however that being said, I’ve picked up one or two things along the way that Melissa has generously given me this space to share... GUEST LIST Being the social beast I am, I found putting together a finalised wedding guest list quite difficult. Much to Melissa’s dismay I wanted to invite everyone I’d ever met and their postman. However, (thankfully) the capacity of our venue and overall budget (I don’t think I appreciated how expensive day guests are) put the brakes on my invite rampage and forced me to reign in my expectations somewhat. I found that I felt quite guilty about not inviting everyone I’ve ever spoken to, but you definitely do need to draw the line somewhere. My advice to anyone planning a wedding is don’t lose any sleep over not inviting someone, chances are they probably weren’t going to invite you to their wedding anyway! CHOOSING YOUR GROOMSMEN Thankfully this was quite an easy one for me. My best man has been my closest ally and confident for 15 years now, so there was no hesitation in my mind when asking him. My biggest concern was that having four groomsmen might be too many, but I couldn’t imagine any of them not being next to me for support, so the thought of losing one of them from the party would have been like removing oxygen. Another thing I’m grateful for is that they all get along brilliantly. I’ve heard some real horror stories about infighting between people’s bridesmaids and groomsmen, so this is definitely something to consider when selecting your party. You might love them all, but do they like each other? You’d think that people would pull together for their friend’s biggest day, but you never know. PLANNING YOUR STAG DO I’ll be honest, I never really saw the purpose of a stag do. Admittedly in my mind, I had this warped perception of the event being a trip to a dubious location to take part in nefarious activities. I’m not a particularly good drinker, and as I creep onto the darker side of my 30s, I’m even worse at handling a hangover, so the prospect of this seemed less than appealing. Sitting down to discuss with my (similarly worldweary) best man, we came to the reassuring realisation that a stag do can be whatever you want it to be. In my instance, I like Centre Parcs, and the thought of a trip there (and many, many barbecues) seemed like a slice of heaven, so this was a bit of a no-brainer. Ultimately my advice to any groom-to-be is don’t be afraid to book something that will make you happy. If your groomsmen deserve their place in your party, they won’t challenge your choices. THE SPEECH This is a big one, probably the biggest responsibility of the groom. The wedding day is such a big event in a person’s life, and the speeches really stick with attendees – good or bad! My first piece of advice would be not to leave it to the last minute. It’s certainly one of those things that can be put off, but I promise it won’t be worth the anxiety! There are thousands of great speech templates online that you can use as a starting point. Once I got started, I found writing about my loved ones and the significance of the day was easy, as it’s your opportunity to be honest, and just gush about everything. You proposed for a reason and this is your chance to share it with everyone, including your bride. Write from your heart, speak from the bottom of your lungs and try not to stare at your feet the whole time! Oh, and practicing the speech once or twice before the big day probably isn’t a bad idea! Thank you for reading and good luck! Dave x www.chrisblackledgephotography.co.uk www.chrisblackledgephotography.co.uk BRIDE’S DIARY 75
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